Things I am excited about

Here is a list of things I am excited about:



Well, they're pretty much all in that poster...

Facts and falsehoods about October 27, 2008

Facts:

• I have to conduct an interview in t-minus 47 minutes.
• I do not have the energy to conduct an interview
• I do not speak Spanish
• I am the only member of the Espresso Roma Eugene team who does not speak Spanish
• This is a communication problem
• I miss my pens
  

Falsehoods:

• I should like to live the rest of my life in the manner in which I have lived the last four days
• My house is very clean
• Beer pong, hooray
  

Facts and Falsehoods about 10-22-2008 or "the cool side of finding out you've always been deformed"

Facts about yesterday

• it is evidently abnormal when, in a normal standing position, the direction your feet point in is 45 degrees outward from the direction your knees point in.
• It is also evidently abnormal when, in a normal standing position, your knees do not touch.
• This had never occurred to me.
• Therefore, I have deformed legs
• Therefore, I have to spend the rest of my life icing my knees for twenty minutes each night, performing special stretches, and wearing orthopedic inserts in my shoes.
• Therefore, I was a little bit bummed
• But at the same time, it explains a lot.

Falsehoods about yesterday

• Cold
• Shorts would have been a bad choice
• South Park is still funny
• South Park has been consistently funny for the last eight years
• My roommates hate South Park and would not watch the same new episode twice in a day
• Life is better now that my iPod headphones are broken
• People who already have their own cigarettes are the last people to ask you for one
  

Truths and falsehoods about October 21, 2008

True facts about today:
+My boss seemed genuinely afraid that I would hate Mexicans. Strangely, he also seemed genuinely afraid I was an illegal immigrant.
+My editor was really certain he loved Cookin' With Coolio, which I told him about. He was somewhat less certain about what article I should write.
+This song is very underrated.
+This soccer team is very overrated. Especially this man.
+As a Polish American, Scottish American, and Catholic American (sorta), that hurt to say.
+I can already tell I'll hate my new job.
+That's a good thing.
+Shorts were a bad choice.

Falsehoods about today:
+My roommates are awake.
+My roommates have left their rooms.
+The mail has come.
+I don't need another cigarette.
+I'm pretty glad my writing partner Jake is in Spain so I don't have to see his bizarrely hairy nose around here, especially on his birthday.

New job, or "Dishwashing AGAIN???"

I'm just about to leave my house to get trained at my new job. I vowed once never to wash dishes again. When I went back to Eugene, I would get a desk job in one of the campus offices, where I could spend 99.9% of my time studying. But it turns out most of those were already taken by the time I returned, so I was left with this. Now every Thursday through Sunday from one to eight, I'll be working the machine at Espresso Roma.

Autobiography, or "The great struggle for things to say"

Recently, I wrote a cover letter for an essay I was submitting to a magazine. The writers guidelines asked that cover letters contain biographical information. Here is what I sent:

I was raised in Hawai'i by a mother who loves cats and wine and a father who loves big, impressive lies and surfing. They named me after a typewriter and soon were divorced. Now, I am an undergraduate student at the University of Oregon currently finishing a Bachelor of Arts in Journalism and learning to pay bills on time. A collection of essays I have written is online at my blog, graphicaccountsofdateswithyourmother.blogspot.com, although that is probably the least important of the biographical details I have included.

Thoughts?

How should I dress for Halloween?

My Halloween costumes have always been bizarre, since I have a lush imagination and little awareness of of the approach of Halloween. Usually, what happens is that I wake up on the morning of the thirtieth and go about my business as normal until some alarming sign reminds me what day it is. Then I scramble to improvise. Once I walked through the University of Oregon campus picking fliers off the ground and taping them to myself: The Human Bulletin Board. Another time I cut air holes in a trash bag and put it over my head, securing it to my neck with a belt: recent suicide. But probably my favorite is one that I came up with in tenth grade, when I had to improvise a costume with five minutes to go before school. The result: an impressionist vision of a highway patrolman, pictured below (I'm the one in the white shirt).


So to answer the question in the title: I'm trying not to think about it.