I had my palm read the other day. Within 2 seconds of looking at my palm, my friend
Mark said, "your going to die in 5 years." Great!
I should probably just end my blogging days here...
...but I won't
...
I enjoy ... way too much
...
sorry i'll stop
So now I really don't care about the whole thing with your mother--even though I told her that I loved her. Ha. Did I mention your mother was an idiot. I should probably throw in alcoholic, coke addict, and in love with meth, but I'll save her the last vestiges of respect from the community. We'll, I guess I didn't anyways. But to sum up, I don't really care, because I'm going to die.
I apologize for the last paragraph, just getting out the frustration of my imminent death.
So now that I have come to grips with my death (I haven't), you are probably wondering what sort of life-changing values I am going to start living by in hopes of redemption. You would expect me to get a new perspective on life, relationships, death, love, comedy, tragedy. It would be expected that, while I am improving the quality of life of those around me, and trying to leave the earth better off than it was when I was born, I will also be figuring out the mysteries of life. Who are we? Where did we come from? Is there a God? In short, I would become the start of a profound new change around the globe that would bring people together around a common goal, and then further my dream by becoming a martyr for something I believe in.
I haven't...remotely (and i'm well aware of the ... usage) so here are my 5 goals before I go to meet my maker in 5 years.
1) Own a sweatshop
2) Eat 37 egg rolis in one sitting (not influenced by drugs)
3) Solely account for 3% of the world's greenhouse gas emissions
4) Trip Scruff McGruff while he is off-duty
5) Become the Mother Teresa of the cashew industry
Oh and getting to that one point with that one person about that one thing that I have always wanted to get to in the overall context of that would be nice, if you know what I mean. And, if not, this will help:
-but even though I pretend otherwise, I'll always remember that one time with your mother
Mark said, "your going to die in 5 years." Great!
I should probably just end my blogging days here...
...but I won't
...
I enjoy ... way too much
...
sorry i'll stop
So now I really don't care about the whole thing with your mother--even though I told her that I loved her. Ha. Did I mention your mother was an idiot. I should probably throw in alcoholic, coke addict, and in love with meth, but I'll save her the last vestiges of respect from the community. We'll, I guess I didn't anyways. But to sum up, I don't really care, because I'm going to die.
I apologize for the last paragraph, just getting out the frustration of my imminent death.
So now that I have come to grips with my death (I haven't), you are probably wondering what sort of life-changing values I am going to start living by in hopes of redemption. You would expect me to get a new perspective on life, relationships, death, love, comedy, tragedy. It would be expected that, while I am improving the quality of life of those around me, and trying to leave the earth better off than it was when I was born, I will also be figuring out the mysteries of life. Who are we? Where did we come from? Is there a God? In short, I would become the start of a profound new change around the globe that would bring people together around a common goal, and then further my dream by becoming a martyr for something I believe in.
I haven't...remotely (and i'm well aware of the ... usage) so here are my 5 goals before I go to meet my maker in 5 years.
1) Own a sweatshop
2) Eat 37 egg rolis in one sitting (not influenced by drugs)
3) Solely account for 3% of the world's greenhouse gas emissions
4) Trip Scruff McGruff while he is off-duty
5) Become the Mother Teresa of the cashew industry
Oh and getting to that one point with that one person about that one thing that I have always wanted to get to in the overall context of that would be nice, if you know what I mean. And, if not, this will help:
-but even though I pretend otherwise, I'll always remember that one time with your mother
-Jake
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